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Siguro kaya hindi ako makramdam ng empathy, dahil lumaki ako na hindi ko kailangang isipin yung nararamdaman ng ibang tao. Sila ang bahalang mag adjust sa lahat ng bagay.

Ang hirap pa ng pakiramdam lalo na't lumaki rin ako na buong pagkakaalam ko, matalino ako--only to realize na wala akong kaalam-alam sa buhay sa kabila ng mga nalalaman ko.

It feels like my life is a lie--i think this thought is the one that makes me feel so depressed kaya wala akong katiwa-tiwala sa sarili ko.

These past few months, kung napansin niyo, ndi na ako masyadong nagoopen sa inyo... i had a really hard time nung muntik mapalayo si sle, at nung umalis na si ezie. I had to protect myself back then. this time sa napapalapit na pag-alis ni anna...at ang naisip ko lang na paraan ay yung matuto ako na magsarili ng mga problema.. i want to be strong. I've been bracing myself for it. Up to this point--ngayon ko lang napansin-- i was only thinking of my own good. I have been too selfish. I've always been so selfish. Sorry hindi ko kayo inisip, hindi ko inisip yung mararamdaman niyo. Masyado akong natatakot para sa sarili ko.

Another reason why I don't seek help anymore is because I'm an attention-hog. I crave for any form of attention... at tuwing humihingi ako ng tulong--- i feel like it's some sort of subconcious call for attention. Baka mas makakatulong na lang sakin kung sasarilinin ko na lang yung problema.

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I'm such a handful. Sometimes I even wonder how you could stand me---I couldn't even stand myself. Minsan gusto kong nang umalis sa group of friends natin kasi hindi ko na matiis yung mga ginagawa ko sa inyo.

I make mistakes; you forgive me; I change for a while and then start hurting you again.

I really really really want to change...stop hurting the people i love/ people who love me. But i don't know why I keep on coming back to this.

lagi na lang akong natatakot na baka may magawa na ako na talagang iiwanan nyo na ako. kasi kahit anong ingat ko, may nagagawa pa rin akong ganun eh.

I wouldn't be surprised if biglaan nyo na lang akong iwan. I feel like I deserve it. You're all great people, bhests.... i feel like you deserve a better friend than me.

i want to change--i'm always trying to [hindi man halata]. i don't know why i can't.

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sorry i can't express my thoughts verbally.. im really not good at it. mas nasasabi ko yung gusto kong sabihin pag through writing. mas napag-iisipan ko (i think)